Symptoms

I've finally started feeling symptoms again. This time they are most certainly NOT pregnancy symptoms! I haven't had normal monthly cycle symptoms since September, so even though it doesn't feel great, it feels great!

I feel like I'm going to start a cycle any day now. The cramping I have now is more "wholesome," meaning all throughout my abdomen instead of in one spot. It's also more of a heavy cramp rather than just one little poke every few hours. Any day now!

My last HCG test was at <2, meaning the miscarriage is over. As of today, it has been 21 days since I've had any bleeding at all. In order for this next cycle to be considered a cycle and not leftover miscarriage tissue, I have to go 20 days without any bleeding what so ever. It's been 21!

So once I start again, it's a new cycle. FINALLY! I have never been so excited for a period before in my life! Sure it's nice not having a period, but when you want a baby and rely on a period it sucks!

I just noticed today is the 3rd. That means it took me 2 months to get back into a cycle. 8 weeks. I have read it will take anywhere from 3-9 weeks to get a cycle after the initial miscarriage, if everything goes well. Mine took so long because my body didn't get rid of everything the first time. So definitely any day now!

Last night, before I fell asleep, I was reminiscing everything my body has been through in the last few months. Our bodies are certainly amazing. Just to think that my body knows how to create a new life out of 2 cells, how to nourish it, how to properly cushion it. Then the fact that my body knows when that life form isn't growing properly, it knows how to deal with it appropriately. I see it as survival of the fittest. If the baby isn't as fit as your body feels it should be, your body can deal with it. To know that my body did it's very best to make sure this whole ordeal went as it should is just amazing to me.

I am happy to be human, and to be a woman.